tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2949807752109701652024-03-26T06:49:01.459-04:00Decorate The SoulJen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.comBlogger201125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-86166928557413437502020-04-27T06:00:00.000-04:002020-04-27T06:00:08.460-04:00Tell The Ones You Love You Love Them<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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"I love you!" I shout at my grandfather as he tries to usher me off the phone - <i>The Big Bang Theory</i> is returning from commercial break and he doesn't want to miss this part (even if I have CLEAR and DISTINCT memories of watching this particular episode 45 times with him). He knows I love him. I tell him every time we talk, I told him every morning and every night and every time I walked out of the house when I lived with him. But still, I want to say it. I <u>need</u> to say it.<br />
<br />
Grandpa pauses. "I love you too, babe." He chuckles, because we both know the routine to the next part. "Be good okay?" "Never! Bye!" He's belly laughing as we hang up the phone. It's become our running joke, that I'm the misbehaving one. We both know I'm too boring to get into any real trouble while all he does is lie and sneak lotto tickets and cinnamon buns into the house when no one's looking.<br />
<br />
My grandfather didn't always hang up the phone with a proclamation of love. I tirelessly wore down the Lower East Side tough guy over the years. My success with him lead me to bully other friends into the same type of relationship. I need to know that they know how I feel.<br />
<br />
I tell the ones I love that I love them because I want to rest easy in the knowledge that if this is the last time I speak with them, I told them how I felt.<br />
<br />
It's kind of dark, I see that, but anything can happen at any moment. When I was eighteen, a dear friend from high school passed away in an accident. I replay the last time I saw him often. I was being a jerk. I was dating a jerk who influenced me to be a jerk and live a pretty jerky lifestyle. And that jerk was standing right next to me as I rejected a hug from my friend. When he passed away, I could physically feel the loss of his arms around me. He had such a specific way of wrapping his arms around you, it was unique to him and my body craved for what was gone. All I was left with to comfort myself was the too-cool attitude I gave him. It haunts me still.<br />
<br />
I recently discussed with a friend how the idea of love varies in culture and upbringings. Love is something held on a pedestal and it's only meant to be given to those who deserve it or hit some items on a checklist. But if you aren't giving love, how can you receive it? I'm not perfect and I don't expect those I love to be perfect either. In fact, I want them to love me because I'm not perfect.<br />
<br />
It might be meaningless to the person I'm pressing my feelings onto, but breaking down how I feel about those I love and simply reminding them also reminds me that if I love them, I have to fully love them, flaws and all. That friend who keeps flaking on me? Yeah, I love her and if I love her, it isn't worth ranting about how she can't keep her schedule together. I'll only rant at her once in a while instead. Or that friend who keeps dating the same type of idiot and lives in a continuous <i>Groundhog Day-</i>like complain cycle? I love her too, and she doesn't need me to attack her for those issues but to sit and love her in silence. And when the door opens to gently nudge her in the right direction.<br />
<br />
Right now, saying "I love you" is the simplest way to remind those in my life that they aren't alone. It's a safety net for me too, because it's something I can cling to when there isn't much other certainty out there. All I can do is hang on to love and give as freely as I can.<br />
<br />
So, if you wasted ten minutes reading this, I love you too.<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com201tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-27998564962413380912020-04-23T06:00:00.000-04:002020-04-23T06:00:01.385-04:00Quarantine Reads To Take You Outside When You're Stuck Inside<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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There ain't much to do in terms of escaping the harsh reality of the indoors during this crazy period of history we're living through. I spend a lot of time daydreaming in my head but even my imagination has limits and I can only test my boyfriend's patience so far.<br />
<br />
I feel a lot like Ariel - <i><b>I wanna be where the people are</b></i> - but since I can't, I dove into some reads that could safely take me out of doors. Like, mentally.<br />
<br />
Below are a list of <b style="background-color: cyan;">10</b> reads guaranteed to take you <i>figuratively</i> out of your house and, for just a little, while simply escape.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">1. Ready Player One by Ernest Cline</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-960EbjJ4M/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by William (@baldbookgeek)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-14T16:10:16+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 14, 2020 at 9:10am PDT</time></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">2. Even Cowgirls Get the Blues by Tom Robbins</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-zHHDnJKDW/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank">
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<div style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-zHHDnJKDW/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by Logic Kitap (@logickitap)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-10T11:26:05+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 10, 2020 at 4:26am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">3. Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut</span><br />
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<blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_C62chg3kF/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="12" style="background: #fff; border-radius: 3px; border: 0; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.5) , 0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: 99.375%;">
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_C62chg3kF/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank"><svg height="50px" version="1.1" viewbox="0 0 60 60" width="50px" xmlns:xlink="https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xmlns="https://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g fill-rule="evenodd" fill="none" stroke-width="1" stroke="none"><g fill="#000000" transform="translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)"><g><path d="M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631"></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div>
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_C62chg3kF/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by πΌ Daisy πΌ (@bookish_extrovert)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-16T14:46:48+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 16, 2020 at 7:46am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">4. A Room With A View by E.M. Forster</span><br />
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<div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;">
<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;">
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<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;">
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-7A_hhAseR/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank">
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<div style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-7A_hhAseR/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by L u a n a (@introverted.bookworm)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-13T13:06:33+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 13, 2020 at 6:06am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">5. The Book Thief by Markus Zusak</span><br />
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<blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/B2oMaK2gr_g/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="12" style="background: #fff; border-radius: 3px; border: 0; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.5) , 0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: 99.375%;">
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<div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;">
<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;">
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<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;">
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<div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;">
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B2oMaK2gr_g/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank"><svg height="50px" version="1.1" viewbox="0 0 60 60" width="50px" xmlns:xlink="https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xmlns="https://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g fill-rule="evenodd" fill="none" stroke-width="1" stroke="none"><g fill="#000000" transform="translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)"><g><path d="M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631"></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div>
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</div>
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B2oMaK2gr_g/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by C.K Robertson | ππΈπΈπ΄πΌπ½πͺπ°π»πͺπΆπ (@byckrobertson)</a> on <time datetime="2019-09-20T09:29:35+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Sep 20, 2019 at 2</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">6. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden</span><br />
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<time datetime="2019-09-20T09:29:35+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">:29am PDT</time></div>
</div>
</blockquote>
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<blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_C3T3dA44l/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="12" style="background: #fff; border-radius: 3px; border: 0; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.5) , 0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0 , 0 , 0 , 0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: 99.375%;">
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<div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;">
<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;">
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<div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;">
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<div style="padding: 19% 0;">
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<div style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_C3T3dA44l/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by Sophie (@soapycoldwell)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-16T14:15:52+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 16, 2020 at 7:15am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">7. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BYIigTFDBKb/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank"><svg height="50px" version="1.1" viewbox="0 0 60 60" width="50px" xmlns:xlink="https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xmlns="https://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g fill-rule="evenodd" fill="none" stroke-width="1" stroke="none"><g fill="#000000" transform="translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)"><g><path d="M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631"></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div>
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BYIigTFDBKb/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by sophia β’ london (@sophia_stories)</a> on <time datetime="2017-08-23T10:45:08+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Aug 23, 2017 at 3:45am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">8. Looking for Alaska by John Green</span><br />
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<div style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;">
<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Cwd0EpHKD/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by Emma | Author?! (@emmaefoxx)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-16T13:16:03+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 16, 2020 at 6:16am PDT</time></div>
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</blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">9. Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-mnlZ5jV9s/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="background: #FFFFFF; line-height: 0; padding: 0 0; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; width: 100%;" target="_blank"><svg height="50px" version="1.1" viewbox="0 0 60 60" width="50px" xmlns:xlink="https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xmlns="https://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g fill-rule="evenodd" fill="none" stroke-width="1" stroke="none"><g fill="#000000" transform="translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)"><g><path d="M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631"></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div>
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B-mnlZ5jV9s/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by Charlotte (@char7891)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-05T14:59:43+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 5, 2020 at 7:59am PDT</time></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">10. Life of Pi by Yann Martel</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Cs1nggrjV/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by malak (@malak.writes)</a> on <time datetime="2020-04-16T12:44:21+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 16, 2020 at 5:44am PDT</time></div>
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<script async="" src="//www.instagram.com/embed.js"></script>Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com342tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-85715837298401592792020-04-20T06:00:00.000-04:002020-04-20T06:00:04.882-04:00Why Now Is The Time To Start A Gratitude Journal<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
One of my favorite TV quotes of all times was spoken by the ever lovely Eric Matthews on <i>Boy Meets World</i>: "Life's tough - get a helmet." I loved it when I was younger. A quirky, funny line spoken by an older brother to a younger one with just a touch of wisdom to create a genuine moment.<br />
<br />
I used to think Eric's advice meant to fortify myself with defenses, to always be prepared for what life threw at you. While that's certainly not a bad interpretation, I think I misunderstood him the first time. You have to make your own lift helmet. I wasted a lot of time doing that with building walls and doing my best to keep people out. As time goes on, I realize that the stuff I make my helmet out of isn't just meant to protect me - it needs to actively help me get back up and keep going too.<br />
<br />
In June of last year, I decided to start a Gratitude Journal. Historically, I'm a pen to paper journal keeper. With my Gratitude Journal, though, I wanted it to be with me everywhere I went. I also wanted to somehow keep it locked down so I could be free to write the super dorky things I wanted to express without the fear a prying eye would find it. Carrying around a physical copy left me feeling exposed. I did a little of the google and discovered <a href="https://penzu.com/" target="_blank">Penzu</a>. It had a lock feature and I downloaded. We've been together ever since.<br />
<br />
My daily goal is to write five things I'm grateful for and sometimes that can be as simple as a text message from a friend or that I did all the dishes. It's small. It doesn't always alter my mood around in the moment, but to be honest, my daily gratitude isn't so much for Present Jen as they are for Future Jen. Penzu sends me e-mails every few days and says "Hey - remember what you wrote on this day in August?" and up pops five things I was grateful for in the past. Rereading small victories that lead me to where I am right now is major. Especially, right now.<br />
<br />
My Gratitude Journal these days tends to read pretty similar no matter what days it is:<br />
1. I am grateful I have a place to live.<br />
2. I am grateful I still have my job.<br />
3. I am grateful I'm not alone.<br />
4. I am grateful I can communicate with my friends.<br />
5. I am grateful I took a shower today.<br />
<br />
And yet. I know it's for future me to remember I made it through. Present Jen is pretty happy to read about the girl who was taking chances with some guy she met on a dating app. I like being reminded about that workout I scheduled with one of my best friends and we didn't end up doing because we sat on the floor in our workout gear and talked for three hours instead. I like remembering that sometimes the smaller moments are the ones I cherish most.<br />
<br />
We're going through a collective trauma together. Right now, it's more crucial to find ways to be thankful and appreciative or we risk sinking to the lowest versions of ourselves. We all need to be reminded that everything, the good and the bad, is temporary. But no matter what moment you're in, we have to find ways to be grateful for where we are.<br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com151tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-28056766010372278302019-09-09T12:01:00.002-04:002019-09-09T12:01:35.086-04:00August Reads<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Stop what you are doing - put everything down, and pick up <i>Maybe You Should Talk to Someone</i>. My friend bugged me and bugged me to start this book and I didn't understand until I finally relented. I have a personal theory that the entire human race should go to therapy, and this book 100% normalizes therapy in such a positive way. I hated finishing this book because I didn't want it to end!<br />
<br />
On another note - I was really bummed by Love Story. I'm so not motivated to watch the movie now.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b><i>Hunger: A Memoir of My Body</i></b><br />
Roxane Gay<br />
<br />
<i><b>Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed</b></i><br />
Lori Gottlieb<br />
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<br />
<br />
<b><i>Love Story</i></b><br />
Erich Segal<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com73tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-53536196988389660252019-09-02T06:00:00.000-04:002019-09-02T06:00:05.531-04:00Saying Hello to an Old Friend<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I hear my name. Iβm walking down the hill, with my Air Pods in, listening to the movie <i>Dumplin</i>β playing on Netflix. If you start a Netflix show, lock your phone and then tap the home button, it gives you the option to play just the sound. Iβve seen <i>Dumplin</i>β a time or two and read the novel; I know the scenes well enough to enjoy the dialogue. Plus, it was the start of a Dumpster Fire week and when those weeks start, Iβm not fit for music.<br />
<br />
I look ahead and behind me before gazing at the line of cars congested at the light. With his window down, my exβs friend β formerly someone I called my own friend β smiled at me across the street. I pulled my right Air Pod out. βHey!β I eagerly shout back, genuinely ecstatic to see him. We smile at each other for a beat. I donβt know what to say. I know he saw my Snapchat I posted on Sunday which clearly showed I'm out in the world dating. He knows, and he still shouted hello.<br />
<br />
βHave a fun ride home,β I shout back before waving and walking away because the excitement of seeing him after so long is starting to be replaced with the very real loss of our friendship.<br />
He waves back and I continue down the street. <br />
<br />
Iβm happy and sad at the same time. I think about last yearβs holiday party and how I restrained myself from fighting the girl I thought was messing with his heart. On the car ride home, I told him how much I cared about him and I hated seeing this girl toying with him. I think about the last car ride when he was dropping me off after dinner and a comedy special at a mutual friendβs house. He passed my apartment building β he was heading for my old place I shared with my ex. I course corrected him and he apologized.<br />
<br />
I look back up the street, but heβs already gone through the light. A break up is really a thousand tiny deaths. When you spend a few years with someone, your lives intertwine. When your time together ends, the entangling isnβt as easy as untwisting the lines youβve lain together. Sometimes, those lines have to snap and break themselves.<br />
<br />
Moving into the city, I didnβt have many friends in the area. I quickly became a part of my exβs friend group and developed solid friendships. When our relationship ended, he reiterated he didnβt want me to pull away from his friends, but how was that fair to them? The memories you make together involve you being a part of a specific couple. The dynamics change when you end things. We both needed separate friends to move through the stages of grief to listen to us cry, get angry, and eventually forgive the other person. <br />
<br />
Breakups donβt just involve two partners. It involves the entire extended network youβve knitted together in your time together. All you can do is be grateful you were able to connect for a brief time because the other option is to be bitter and I don't think that really honors the friendships you created.<br />
<br />
I text my exβs friend that night. I thank him for saying hello to me and that I missed him. He responded and told me Iβd always be a friend. Iβm probably never going to share a meal with him again and dissect the signs the latest girl heβs dating is sending. But, weβll have happy hellos when we pass each other on the street and I know I can always use more of those.<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com101tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-49381775968556079752019-08-01T06:00:00.000-04:002019-08-01T06:00:02.441-04:00July Reads<br />
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<br /><br />
July flew by and I can't believe August is upon us. In that time, I only managed to complete three books, but of course I have three books in my Currently Reading tab.<br />
<br /><br />
<br />
I enjoyed <i>Dumplin</i>' so much. It differs slightly from the movie which made it enjoyable enough for me and threw in a few extra surprises that kept me still interested. I highly recommend, even if you've already seen the Netflix movie.<br />
<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"><i>Dumplin'</i></span></b><br />
Julie Murphy<br />
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<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">The Glass Castle</span></b></i></div>
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Jeannette Walls</div>
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<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">Wonder</span></b></i></div>
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R.J. Palacio</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com213tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-31475444795847876492019-07-25T06:00:00.001-04:002019-07-25T06:00:05.102-04:00Leaning Into Summer Slowdown<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I belong in a warm climate, soaking up the sun while listening to whatever playlist moves me in the moment. Unfortunately, I reside in a climate that is rainy with a sprinkling of sunshine. Last summer, I beat myself ragged trying to make sales reselling and snag every resume I could (I was still working as a freelance resume writer). I couldn't beat the weather, though. Everyone else was outside soaking it up, largely leaving my sales dry and professionals seeking new job opportunities were few and far between.<br />
<br />
This year, I shifted my focus. I spend most nights outside when the weather allows. I edit podcast episodes in my courtyard. I walk to a nearby park and edit photos on my phone. More often than not, my work is not keeping up with the standards I set during the rest of the year. I will happily abandon work to play in the pool or barbecue at a friend's house. The world is out and I want to enjoy it.<br />
<br />
Last year, I was desperate for a few moments to call a true summer day. I walked away with none. This year, I have so many in my pocket to sustain me through the rest of the year and keep me motivated. In fact, Summer 2019 inspired new goals for me to set and achieve.<br />
<br />
My motto for 2019 (I know, I've mentioned this 4,000 times) is "Be Brave." I'm being brave in asking for what I want, but also asking myself what I truly want. Instead of finding reasons for why those aren't feasible wants or dreams, I'm taking the time to truly assess them. I'm changing them from dreams to goals. I'm making them realistic.<br />
<br />
To support that, this summer I've also started sessions with a Career Counselor who's helping me align my values and desires into a professional career path. It's exciting and it feels like the first time I've been allowed to truly think outside the box while being validated for it.<br />
<br />
Summer slowdown is a time to enjoy the hard work from the year, but also to ensure the goals I'm setting are truly what set my soul on fire. Hopefully, the slowdown of Summer 2019 will help me prepare for Summer 2020 in ways I couldn't imagine.<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-17158292398646049892019-07-22T06:00:00.001-04:002019-07-22T06:00:05.609-04:00Living Alone After Living With A Partner<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I make myself a cup of coffee and sit on the couch with a blanket wrapped around my legs. I switch the TV over to view Netflix and watch The Office for the 45,672nd time. I grab my phone and login to Poshmark from the web browser. I share my closet, finish my coffee, and make myself eggs with onions, tomatoes, and goat cheese. Finishing up with The Office, I get ready for work while listening to a favorite playlist or podcast as loud as I want (within reason, I don't want to upset my neighbors). I chase Charlie, kiss her goodbye, and head out the door.<br />
<br />
No one whined from the bedroom to make them coffee. No one begrudged me the time I took to spend on reselling, because it took time away from helping them get dressed in the morning. I didn't have to give advice on whether a tie matched a shirt. No one snatched the remote away from me to watch the news. No one stood by the door tapping their feet because I was making them late for work.<br />
<br />
Living alone after living with a partner is a new kind of normal. You're more aware of all of the things you gave up to merge your lives together. Your bedtime is no longer determined by someone else's wake up call. You don't have to use the bathroom in shifts. You know who left that dish in the sink.<br />
<br />
You're also aware of all of things you have to do alone. When the new season of that TV show you both watched together drops on Netflix, you can watch it by yourself but you'll think of the comments they would have made. Your Netflix algorithm is still infected with all of the shows they like to watch. When you're feeling down, there's no one around to make you laugh. You have to empty the dishwasher every single time.<br />
<br />
I gained back my independence. I gained back the permission to focus on myself instead of serving the needs of someone else. I gained back my life. But, I still feel the loss of a life that was almost mine. It was the wrong life and it would have ended sadly, but the ghost of it still haunts me.<br />
<br />
When I get home from work, Charlie greets me cheerfully, happier in this home than she has been in any other. I choose whether I want to make dinner that night, eat leftovers, or simply eat a protein bar. I waste a lot of time dancing in front of the mirror. I lay in the middle of my bed and fall asleep watching The Office for the 45,673rd time.<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com36tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-64985477579353989492019-07-18T16:41:00.000-04:002019-07-21T16:56:26.380-04:00My Favorite Personal Blog Posts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I've been blogging on and off for four years. I remember sneakily sitting at my desk at work and drafting up the first post with such excitement. What feels true to me after four years, is that I still clearly lack direction. Looking for inspiration to figure out where I wanted these blogs to take me, I reread some of my favorite posts, which I've listed below. I'm hoping to aspire to this type of writing more often.<br />
<br />
If you haven't checked them out, I hope you do and enjoy :)<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/01/stephen-chbosky-is-haunting-mesort-of.html">Stephen Chbosky is Haunting Me...Sort Of</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/02/making-space-letting-go.html">Making Space & Letting Go</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/02/parents-are-people-too-what-i-learned.html">Parents Are People Too: What I Learned As A Fur Baby Parent</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/07/two-miles.html">Two Miles</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/07/things-i-thought-were-more-likely-to.html">Things (I Thought Were) More Likely To Happen Than Derek Jeter Getting Married</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/05/16-things-i-learned-when-my-best-friend.html">16 Things I Learned When My Best Friend Got Cancer at 26</a><br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-38807540292759320492019-07-15T12:08:00.001-04:002019-07-15T13:15:45.807-04:00Letting In<br />
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<br />
It's the moment I realize I'm more changed than I thought.<br />
<br />
He shook his head at first, and then looked at me. His friend's outstretched hand held a cigar. "I know you don't like these," he said. But he does, and he was saying no. "It's fine," I said. "Seriously, go for it."<br />
<br />
After dinner one evening, we walked by a cigar bar. The smell poured into the street and I waved my hand in front of my nose. I mumbled I couldn't stand the smell. Days later he remembered and in the comfort of his own backyard turned down something he enjoyed...for me.<br />
<br />
Staring at him, just a few feet away, he blew the smoke out of the corner of his mouth turning his head away from my direction. I moved closer and kissed him. He apologized and I shook my head, unsure why I thought he'd never looked so irresistibly attractive to me, even while doing something I wasn't a major fan of.<br />
<br />
As I found my way back to my seat, I recognized the uneasiness as something I'd been feeling lately. It was the same confusion I felt earlier in the evening when he lowered the spice level on his Thai food. Or when he double checked that it was okay to go camping without me. Or the night I thought I was sick and he stayed up with me and continued to stay up to watch over me when I finally did fall asleep.<br />
<br />
The question I kept asking myself was, why is he doing that? The simple answer is that he was thinking about me. And I don't expect anyone to think of me.<br />
<br />
The thing that movies and books don't tell you about love falling apart is how it changes you. There is far better love out there--they've got that story line nailed down--but they don't talk about how your sense of trust is broken, almost skeptically so. The person you were before you fell in love for the first time is jaded, even though you don't want to be. It doesn't matter that you've moved on and are ready for the next adventure. There's still a visible scar left from the last tumble. Falling again isn't as easy as the first, even though the next person deserves it so much more.<br />
<br />
As I leaned my head back and looked up at the stars, I felt a twinge of anger that the past can still hold so much power over who you are. I was mad that I didn't know how to accept someone else's kindness without wondering what the motive was underneath. I was mad that I set the bar so low. I was mad that I ever let someone forget me. I was mad that I no longer trust easily.<br />
<br />
An hour or so later, his friend offered him another cigar. This time, he turned it down without looking to me and, instinctively, I knew if I wasn't there he would have enjoyed another. I leaned into him. He pulled me closer, where I remained for the rest of the evening with my head on his shoulder.<br />
<br />
I'm not who I was before, but maybe that means I'll be open for far more meaningful experiences.<br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-18530704467278247492019-07-11T06:00:00.001-04:002019-07-11T06:00:03.068-04:00Get it Movin' Playlist<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
It's been quite some time since I created a playlist. My tastes used to lean specifically emo or pop/punk, but my current Liked Song list on Spotify is pretty random and probably the furthest from my standard. Lyrics tend to reach me, but lately, beats and the mood it inspires is something I crave.<br />
<br />
Below is a list of songs I listen to when I'm running low on energy and need a quick pick me up. The lyrics don't exactly express that, but try leaning into the sounds.<br />
<br />
To be honest - this playlist is heavily inspired by the movie <i>Someone Great</i> and its soundtrack<i>. </i>If you haven't watched that movie...why?!?!<br />
<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvBOZCrJsAI" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Livin' Thing</a> - Electric Light Orchestra</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhumCu3fzMI" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Cracklin' Rose</a> - Neil Diamond</li>
<li><span style="background-color: #9fc5e8;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y83x7MgzWOA" target="_blank">I Don't Care</a> </span>- Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGIm0-dQd8M" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Dura</a> - Daddy Yankee</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHt-Y4r1RFs" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Last One</a> - The Aces</li>
<li><span style="background-color: #9fc5e8;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiGpTy9Pr1E" target="_blank">Should I</a> </span>- Phoebe Ryan</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P00HMxdsVZI" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Truth Hurts</a> - Lizzo</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEb5gNsmGJ8" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Never Really Over </a>- Katy Perry</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2BYmmTI04I" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">She Looks So Perfect</a> - 5 Seconds of Summer</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4-jOuHO-z4" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Electricity</a> - Silk City, Dua Lipa</li>
<li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXpYoiCOuLE" style="background-color: #9fc5e8;" target="_blank">Saturdays</a> - Twin Shadow & Haim</li>
</ul>
<div>
Let me know if you gave any of these a listen and if they inspired anything for you! I'm also open to new inspiring tunes :)</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-2003533378111311422019-07-08T06:00:00.000-04:002019-07-08T06:00:02.555-04:00Cheap Date Ideas<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Recently, I was catching up with an old friend who was struggling financially in the arena of dating. Taking girls to dinner to never see them again seemed to be a waste of money but he also didn't want to cheapen the experience by asking them to split their meals. His wallet was as empty as his heart.<br />
<br />
I'm a self-admitted cheapo. Spending too much money on anything is guaranteed to bring on a panic attack...and what I define as too much money is what normal people spend on a soda. I'm over the edge, I'm aware of this.<br />
<br />
Dating doesn't have to be all high pressure fancy dinners and flowers. There are tons of ways to connect with a new suitor or reconnect with your love that won't break the bank.<br />
<br />
<h2>
Take Advantage of Where You Live</h2>
<div>
Do you live by the beach? Beach dates are easy, cheap, and a great way to talk and get to know the person you're dating or to reconnect with your partner. I live in Pittsburgh which gives me the opportunity to take in sights like <a href="https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g53449-d272285-Reviews-Mount_Washington-Pittsburgh_Pennsylvania.html" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Mount Washington</a> or walk along <a href="https://www.dcnr.pa.gov/StateParks/FindAPark/PointStatePark/Pages/default.aspx" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Point State Park</a>. Utilize what's nearby to access free fun and in-depth conversations. Here are a few ideas:</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li>Go for a hike.</li>
<li>Or a much simpler nature walk through the woods.</li>
<li>Walk along a river/lake/ocean/bridge overlooking one of these things.</li>
<li>Explore a neighborhood you're not quite familiar with and pop into shops that interest you.</li>
</ul>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Put Together a Puzzle</h2>
</div>
<div>
Nothing like a team activity to see how your date performs under pressure! There's also a sense of accomplishment you'll build a bond over when the puzzle is complete.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Hold A Competitive Game Night</h2>
<div>
Competition makes the heart grow fonder. Each of you could choose a favorite game and wager a bet - loser plans the next date! This will also help you identify whether your latest date is a sore loser or takes winning a bit too seriously.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Go Thrifting Together</h2>
<div>
While a little nontraditional and may require you to spend some money, it'll be minimal at best. Thrifting together will bring up different memories for each of you to share as you dive through old treasures. It will even give you a sense as to what your date values and if your aesthetics match.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Hit Karaoke Night</h2>
<div>
Maybe you're too shy to jump up on that stage, but the two of you can still enjoy those brave enough to do so. At most, this will cost you a drink or two while guaranteeing some laughs.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Stargazing</h2>
<div>
This is easy and can be done anywhere! Pack a thermos in the chillier months or some snacks in the summer and you have a romantic evening set for two. Don't forget a blanket for you to sit on!</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Go Bike Riding</h2>
<div>
If you're athletic and being in the outdoors is a priority to you, there's no better way to allow someone to get to know you like bike riding. Just about everyone can ride a bike and in larger cities bikes are available to rent at a lower cost. You can slowly coast down streets, dissecting the lawn choices of homeowners in your neighborhood and chat while you take a quick tour.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<h2>
Go to Trivia Night</h2>
<div>
Trivia Night holds a lot of chances for conversation while still being a team sport. It allows you to be in a public setting if you're not quite ready to bring them home. Or, if you're in a long term relationship, it gets you out of the house without straining your credit card.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Do you have any cheap date ideas? Leave them below in the comments! :)</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-76938439729606280192019-07-04T06:00:00.000-04:002019-07-04T06:00:05.690-04:00New Year's Resolutions: 6 Month Checkup<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
This year, I was serious about setting some resolutions to stick to (<a href="http://www.decoratethesoul.com/2019/01/new-years-resolutions-2019.html" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">New Year's Resolutions 2019</a>). I made them in the hopes of injecting deeply needed positivity into my life.<br />
<br />
And then, everything fell apart.<br />
<br />
Hindsight is 20/20. It's really super easy to go back and beat up on yourself with the information you have at hand today. There are always signs but sometimes those clues only stick out once the puzzle is completed.<br />
<br />
Now, it's July. I have a new life I'm still struggling to define. I'm a lot clearer on the things I don't want, but I'm still not sure about what it is that actually moves me. I'm working on finding the things that settle my soul. I'm learning to love myself and to appreciate the amazing people who are currently in my life, but also expressing gratitude for the people who were only meant to make quick cameos in my story.<br />
<br />
In January, my resolutions were:<br />
<br />
<ol>
<li>Swim once a week.</li>
<li>No potato chips.</li>
<li>Read 1 book a week, 52 books total for the year.</li>
<li>Not staying up late mindlessly scrolling on social media.</li>
<li>Follow my dreams by not listening to those who doubt them even if I'm crashing and burning.</li>
</ol>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I moved into a new building with a pool and I do make the effort to swim when I can. I fell off reading, but I'm back on the horse. I still stay up too late. I ate a lot of chips this past spring but I can't remember when I had one last. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what my dreams are.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I'm realigning my resolutions for the rest of 2019: to live in the moment, be grateful for those moments, and to love and know myself more fully.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here's to the next 6 months!</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-6388157196111528652019-07-01T06:00:00.000-04:002019-07-01T06:00:02.780-04:00June Reads<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
The sun came out (fina-freaking-ly!) in the second half of June here in Pittsburgh. There's nothing I love more than getting lost in a book underneath the sun and next to a body of water. Which is why I was pretty adamant about moving into an apartment complex with a pool. This is how I lamely like to spend my summer: I read until I sweat so much I can't take it anymore. I go take a dip in the pool, swim around like a mermaid, and get back out to dry off while reading. Then, repeat.<br />
<br />
This is all to say that I read a ridiculous amount of pages in the summer and also fully fund the sunblock companies.<br />
<br />
I really enjoyed my first read of June, <i>What If It's Us</i>. It's co-written by <i>Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda</i> author, Becky Albertalli and I really like the way she draws the reader in. I almost read it in one sitting, just like I did with <i>Simon</i> a year ago.<br />
<br />
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">What If It's Us</span></b></i><br />
Becky Albertalli & Adam Silvera<br />
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<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>The Sun Is Also a Star</b></i></span><br />
Nicola Yoon<br />
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<i><br /></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Ready Player One</b></span></i><br />
Ernest Cline<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-36551613663161480442019-06-27T06:00:00.000-04:002019-06-27T06:00:08.759-04:00Apps I'm Digging Right Now<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When I upgraded to my iPhone XR, I was so excited to download all the apps I couldn't fit before on my limited storage iPhone 6. I discovered there are a lot of random apps to download out there.<br />
<br />
I decided to do a round-up of the apps I used over the past few months and share justhow I use them. Some of these apps have paid options, but I only use the free versions!<br />
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<h2>
Penzu</h2>
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Right now, I'm really focused on keeping a gratitude journal for the moments when life knocks me off my feet. <a href="https://penzu.com/" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Penzu</a> is a great way for me to document 5 things I'm grateful for each day. It also has the ability to lock my posts so I don't have to worry about someone accidentally getting in there. I wanted to have my gratitude journal with me at all times in case I really needed to either write or read how great things really are.</div>
<h2>
Oak</h2>
<div>
<a href="https://www.oakmeditation.com/" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Oak</a> 100% changed my life. Falling asleep is extremely difficult for me; however, when I turn on the Relaxing Sounds Sleep meditation (background - fireplace), I'm on my way to dreamland in no time at all. There are also options for guided meditation but I'm still too far away in my mindfulness practices to sit still long enough.</div>
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<h2>
Lightroom</h2>
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Yes, I am late to the <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.adobe.lrmobile&hl=en_US" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Lightroom</a> party. I tried to stay away, but here I am, advocating for it's magnificence. I do not purchase presets, but fiddle around with my own. My goal is to create an Instagram feed that is bright and as unfiltered as possible. I rely heavily on exposure and adjusting the color temperatures.</div>
<h2>
Transit</h2>
<div>
This app covers my booty daily. I can track where my bus is and how much time I have to scoot out of my apartment and make it to work only mildly late. <a href="https://transitapp.com/" style="background-color: #999999;" target="_blank">Transit</a> is easy to use, kinda fool-proof which is good for a dummy like me.</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-74163439432995299432019-06-24T09:52:00.001-04:002019-06-24T09:52:17.322-04:00My Recommended Reading List<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
On this blog, I published a few To Read Book Lists (<a href="http://www.decoratethesoul.com/2018/04/5-non-fiction-books-to-read-this-spring.html" style="background-color: #999999;">5 Non-Fiction Books to Read This Spring</a>, <a href="http://www.decoratethesoul.com/2018/04/5-books-to-read-this-spring.html" style="background-color: #999999;" target="">5 Books to Read This Spring</a>, <a href="http://www.decoratethesoul.com/2015/11/10-books-that-changed-me.html" style="background-color: #999999;">10 Books That Changed Me</a>), but I realized while I am documenting what I read each month, I haven't done much recommending lately.<br />
<br />
Reading is an ebb and flow hobby for me. Sometimes, I rarely find myself coming up from air because I'm so invested in a book and I'll greedily down the next one right after as well. Other times, books remain on my shelf looking unloved and unwanted. <br />
<br />
This a list of 6 books I felt truly stayed with me, no matter what season of reading I found myself in. If you check any of them out - let me know what you think!!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda</b> - Becky Albertalli</span><br />
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<a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/By82TF5ggva/" style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">A post shared by Karissa β’ 25 β’ OKC (@porterspages)</a> on <time datetime="2019-06-20T23:54:51+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Jun 20, 2019 at 4:54pm PDT</time></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>The Hate U Give</b> - Angie Thomas</span><br />
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<b> </b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>The Last Black Unicorn</b> - Tiffany Haddish</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time</b> - Mark Haddon</span><br />
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<script async="" src="//www.instagram.com/embed.js"></script>Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-26862770240634180922019-06-20T06:00:00.000-04:002019-06-20T06:00:05.156-04:00Jack of All Trades<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
After wandering down windy middle-of-nowhere roads, we pulled into a gravel driveway leading to my cousin's new wife's family's home (that was a mouthful, and I cut out the part where he's actually my second cousin, not my first cousin). A large door hanging in the middle of the lawn welcomed us to The Copper Door. In the front of the house, a tiny entrance to what looked like an even tinier store enticed us with kitschy signs.<br />
<br />
My cousin's father-in-law directed us to park in the back and we all settled into celebrate their marriage which officially started an hour prior. Jane, my new cousin-in-law's mother, stirred potatoes and shouted orders to her husband in preparation of dinner, still dressed with her hair beautifully done. My mom couldn't contain her curiosity and asked about the store in the front of the house. Jane shrugged, indicating it wasn't much of anything, but her niece Jenna stepped in.<br />
<br />
"C'mon, you guys gotta see this," Jenna said, ushering us down stairs into a large basement where she informed us the arrangements for the store were put together. "Luckily, we have this space because we've largely been using it for making cookies." (Sidenote: <span style="background-color: #999999;"><a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/16/dining/16cookies.html" target="_blank">Cookie Tables</a> </span>at weddings is a huge Western Pennsylvania tradition. It's fantastic.)<br />
<br />
Jenna led us through a side door, leading me to a meticulously maintained hair washing station. "This is a...hair salon?" I asked. "We also do nails. Actually, I do the nails!" Jenna proudly declared. "Oh, I thought this was like a store or something," I said before noticing a further larger entrance that opened up into the most endearing country store I've ever seen.<br />
<br />
I walked through and stared at the obvious skill put into arranging the store. To the left a beach theme greeted me. In the center of the room, country farm decor exploded into the space. Off to the side, a 4th of July theme edged for space. <br />
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"Wait, Jane has a country store and a hair salon?" I twirled to find Jenna, who had a smile plastered on her face.<br />
<br />
"Yup, Aunt Jane loves both businesses and she figured, why not do both?"<br />
<br />
"And she does it all from home," I commented and ran my hand over a painted cow Jenna proudly told me was crafted by Jane's husband.<br />
<br />
I wandered through the aisles, with my eyes darting back to the hair salon. Two completely separate passions operating within inches of each other all by the same owner. "She must have been doing this for years. When did she start this?"<br />
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"Oh, only about 5 or 7 years ago maybe? This is all pretty new. She just decided to go for it and both are doing really, really well," Jenna responded with genuine pride.<br />
<br />
I want to be a writer, and a reseller, and a website designer, and maybe some type of social media marketing or public relations person, or even a data analyst because I am a dork who likes numbers. I'm so terrified of picking one but as I found myself in yet another room full of faux floral arrangements, I realized maybe I don't have to choose just one. <br />
<br />
For a long time the saying, "jack of all trades, master of none" dominated my thoughts. I feared if I didn't pick one thing to master and spent my time fanning the tiny flames of all my passions, I wouldn't accomplish anything at all. BUT, if I did pick only one path to pursue, would there be pieces of me left unsatisfied? I felt stuck and stressed that I'm 30 and still don't know what I'm going to be when I grow up.<br />
<br />
Jane's hair salon and county store weren't competing passions. Both businesses fulfilled her so she pursued them both and in the same space so she could devote time to each as needed. I can follow more than one career path if I really want to. I'm never going to be too old. All it takes is a little mental reframing, belief in myself, and a bit of a middle finger to the traditional career pathways. <br />
<br />
And if there's one thing I love, it's a middle finger.<br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-72515533440272062732019-06-17T06:00:00.000-04:002019-06-17T06:00:05.000-04:00Things to Do on a Long Commute<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Earlier this year, when I was in between apartments, I not only moved into my parents' townhouse for a brief period of time but became a long-drive commuter. If that's not a thing, it should be known henceforth as a form of corporal punishment. My 15 minute bus ride transformed into an hour and a half journey to and from work.<br />
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With time on my hands and loads of traffic in the way, I quickly adapted to my new life chained to my car. Living in New York, I traveled up to two hours one way on public transportation, but I was able to read. That type of activity is discouraged when you're operating heavy machinery for some reason.<br />
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So, I looked for new ways to make my time useful and entertaining. Here are a few things I delved into.<br />
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<h2>
Learn a Language</h2>
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This was actually super easy and fun to do while I was driving. Specifically, I listened to <a href="https://radiolingua.com/category/coffee-break-spanish/" target="_blank">Coffee Break Spanish</a> (they have a bunch of other languages available). I improved my Spanish pretty quickly and even created Spanish music playlists to further pursue phrases and pronunciations. All for free!</div>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: large;">Get Into A New Podcast</span></h2>
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As I mentioned in my <a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2019/04/podcasts-im-digging-right-now.html">Podcasts I'm Digging Right Now</a> post back in April, I started listening to a lot of new podcasts. A long drive allows you to complete an entire episode so you don't have to wait to find out the ending. And, if you happen to be browsing for a great podcast, I heard <a href="https://open.spotify.com/show/6TNBAOjuG7kxlEdqJtenjR" target="_blank">Reseller Water Cooler</a> is pretty dope.</div>
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<br /></div>
<h2>
Start an Audio Book</h2>
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I still love reading, and I was missing out on the way that reading allows you to create a movie in your head. I snagged two free books through Audible and listened along as the miles wore on, and on, and on...<br />
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<h2>
Set Goals for the Day</h2>
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Each morning, I would turn the radio off and tune in with myself to set realistic goals and expectations for each day. I reviewed items I needed to accomplish and envisioned myself completing them. Picturing myself completing larger projects really gave me an extra push and allowed me to be excited for my day.<br />
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<h2>
Call Friends & Reconnect</h2>
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<div>
On the way home from work, I used the opportunity to chat with friends I hadn't spoken with in a while and used it as time to get back in touch without bills or chores to distract me. I could stay totally focused on my friend and strengthen our friendships. </div>
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These are just a few ways I kept it together on my commute - hope they help make yours a much more smoother ride!</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-63237043823860641842019-06-13T06:00:00.000-04:002019-06-13T06:00:01.159-04:00How to Stay Focused To Get Things Done<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I'm a victim of the 90's mentality that multi-tasking is a good thing. Forty different items pop around in my head at any moment demanding my immediate attention. With that, I strain to zero in on and complete one task. I constantly have multiple projects open. My To Do List is a never-ending monster stimulating anxiety.<br />
<br />
I broke. I was tired of never feeling accomplished and frustrated with how long simple items seemed to suck out of my day. I knew things needed to change.<br />
<br />
I started with blocking out distractions...not realizing how 99.9% of my life is a distraction. I implemented the following items below and I see a drastic increased in my productivity and project completion rates.<br />
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<h2>
Mute Group Messages</h2>
<div>
Not surprisingly, cell phones and the constant connection they provide aren't helping any. Every time my phone lit up with a message that wasn't for me, it still caused a break in my focus when I leaned over to see who it was from. (For iPhone users, you can tap the little info button within the group messages and slide Hide Alerts on.) I do this on auto-pilot every time I am added to a group message. I can check the messages and respond when I'm available without breaking my flow.</div>
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Not every message in a group text is for you. If someone needs your immediate attention, they can reach out to you directly. It also saves your phone's battery life.</div>
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<h2>
Turn Off Social Media Notifications</h2>
<div>
Do you really need to know who just followed you on Instagram? Or that your great-aunt tagged you in yet another pasta meme on Facebook? Social media notifications drag you down into a dark hole of social media creeping. Two hours later you come up from air after stalking the original cast of <i>The Real World's </i>social media channels with nothing left to show for it except useless knowledge about how they all fared after their notoriety. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div>
Sticking to a strict schedule of when I'm allowed to social media didn't specifically work for me, but without an invite through a notification I'm able to limit my time and only dive in when I have a moment or two to goof off. The only notifications I receive to my phone are business (eBay, Poshmark, Mercari) related or text messages. Sorry to the all the YouTubers I subscribe to - I'm not running to watch your latest video when they drop.</div>
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<br /></div>
<h2>
Make Accomplished Lists</h2>
<div>
To Do Lists hold the unique ability to crush my spirit. After a long day, seeing the items left incomplete lead to a feeling of utter failure. No matter how many items were checked off in my Google Keep, the amount of what was left to do still outweighed my success visually. Thus, Accomplished Lists were born.</div>
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An Accomplished List displays exactly what you should be grateful for accomplishing and gives you the motivation to keep moving. I still keep a To Do List, but when I'm able to see what I've completed (in a cute way) it encourages me to do just one thing more.</div>
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<h2>
Put Your Phone on Do Not Disturb When Working on a Deadline</h2>
<div>
This is the ultimate in staying focused. I create a specific song list or simply replay a song over and over to give me the right fuel for the task so I'm not tempted to play with my phone. With Do Not Disturb on, my phone never lights up and I can forget it exists. I can't be dragged into a friendly text conversation or feel anxiety about not sharing my Poshmark closet enough because there's no reminder vibrating on the desk next to me.</div>
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I find this to be highly effective in zoning out the world and completing what I've set out to do. Also, sorry Kristen, because I just dropped out in the middle of our conversation so I could DND my phone and finish this blog post. </div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-16361912121842256822019-06-10T14:02:00.000-04:002019-06-24T09:15:05.969-04:00May Reads<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I didn't read this month. I didn't want to. I felt really blocked up.<br />
<br />
I did manage to make it through one, Hillbilly Elegy, and it was actually an insightful read. As someone who grew up with the Appalachian mountains a bit of a drive away, I was more than aware of the poverty that existed in these regions...but I didn't understand the poverty and politics. I would highly recommend no matter what your political leaning. I wish there were more books like this out there.<br />
<br />
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis</span></b></i><br />
J.D. Vance<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKgCQ0EQqCLp4eyHCD4gl1B5Mc8v04QF2eFQSnuG6ZzKcKH_u-6WgOkKyVxSjJ0vnlI90P6YUMKt5yHSV-WQWDzTEHB7FYb-AYT4xQOEawdUfCjyqgQP0MUMuTivs5pHBV-TCAFK1TpjU/s1600/autumn+moments.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="560" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKgCQ0EQqCLp4eyHCD4gl1B5Mc8v04QF2eFQSnuG6ZzKcKH_u-6WgOkKyVxSjJ0vnlI90P6YUMKt5yHSV-WQWDzTEHB7FYb-AYT4xQOEawdUfCjyqgQP0MUMuTivs5pHBV-TCAFK1TpjU/s320/autumn+moments.png" width="320" /></a><br />
<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-55218225476109449642019-06-06T06:00:00.000-04:002019-06-06T06:00:00.223-04:00Why You Need To Clear Your Search History...Now<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
It was our fourth date and I finally set the evening up so he could meet my cat.<br />
<br />
Yes, you read that sentence correctly.<br />
<br />
After dinner at a delicious taco place, we meandered back to my place and sat down to watch TV. He suggested some YouTube videos. I have a vague recollection of trying to flirt while I old school searched through letters on my remote control to find what we were looking for. I also have a vague recollection of silence on his end. Probably because he was reading my search history, in LARGE view, on my television:<br />
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<br />
*A moment of silence for any appearance of being cool I may have held, dying and withering away.* (To be fair, I was researching potential clickbait articles because my top blog post ever is <a href="https://www.decoratethesoul.com/2016/05/how-to-make-him-fall-in-love-with-you.html" target="_blank">How To Make Him Fall In Love With You</a>. ...whatever, I don't need to explain myself to you!!!!)<br />
<br />
The next day at work, I wanted to search for Kim Petras' <i>Heart to Break, </i>that doesn't exist on Spotify (WHY KIM!?), when I was confronted with my most recent searches on YouTube. In the third spot, a little below my search for old Pittsburgh Mike videos, was "How to Handle An Obsessive Crush."<br />
<br />
Freaking A.<br />
<br />
There isn't a dumb enough question out there that is too dumb for me to ask. It's something I mention in interviews because I want my potential future employers to know I'm not afraid to ask if I want to know something, no matter how ridiculous. The beauty of the Internet is that everything in the world is one search away from being answered. <br />
<br />
To stay on topic, I searched "do you judge someone by their search history" and was surprised to see that your search history can be used against you in court, there are sites out there selling your search history for market data, and forums dedicated to partners snooping on their S.O's browser history. I didn't find anyone who creeped on a potential suitor's history and found anything as innocently psycho as dealing with my obsession for my latest crush -- mostly it was disturbing porn, but I didn't feel really confident that my search was any less concerning.<br />
<br />
In all seriousness, our search results reveal things about ourselves. They show our interests, things we'd like to pursue, or what we find to be really, really funny. They are tiny windows into who we are.<br />
<br />
Which is why you should delete the crazy shit and hide it or you will probably end up alone with your cat. At least my cat is a cuddler. CLEAR YOUR SEARCH HISTORY, PEOPLE. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.<br />
<br />
Either way, I live to die of self-inflicted humiliation another day.<br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-79056216638466636362019-05-23T06:00:00.000-04:002019-05-23T06:00:02.748-04:00Summer 2019 Bucket List<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm not one for Bucket Lists. Or checklists. Or anything that tells me what to do, generally. I'm stubborn that way. I scoff at plans; life should be embraced and what the universe throws at me I lovingly accept. It's nice in theory, but if I'm not putting myself out there to experience new things I'm going to experience a whole lot of days on the couch watching <i>The Golden Girls</i> (not a bad option either).<br />
<br />
With my 2019 mantra of "Be Brave," I've concocted this silly bucket list I'm hoping to accomplish by summer's end...which is arbitrary in itself because when does summer really end? Labor Day Weekend? September 23rd? That's a rambling blog post for another day.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">2019 Summer Bucket List:</span></b><br />
1. Karaoke for the first time ever!<br />
2. Go horseback riding/take lessons.<br />
3. Go on a hike that involves the use of a water bladder because I fell in love with that thing in <a href="http://decoratethesoul.blogspot.com/2018/08/50-states-challenge-utah.html" target="_blank">Utah</a>.<br />
4. Swim in the ocean.<br />
5. Visit a state I have not been to and check off another one on my <a href="http://decoratethesoul.blogspot.com/p/50-state-challenge.html" target="_blank">50 States</a> list.<br />
6. Go to a live concert (already have this one planned with Kristen & Bryan!).<br />
7. Throw a barbecue/party - I'm always so anxious about having people over, but I've moved into a great place for parties so I need to just do it!<br />
8. Watch fireworks! (My favorite, but I've seemed to miss them the past few years).<br />
9. Road trip somewhere.<br />
10. Go fishing.<br />
<br />
What are you hoping to accomplish this summer? Any summer must-dos I missed?<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-36452245152600663132019-05-20T06:00:00.000-04:002019-05-20T06:00:02.822-04:00I Thought Internet Dating Was Weird Until I Realized I Met All of My Friends on Instagram<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Raphaela and Mike sat across from me, all of us downing our various versions of a "healthy" salad. Mine included a side of fries. Before dinner, I conquered the Goodwill Outlet for the very first time with their help.<br />
<br />
Just a little over a year ago, another thrifter from Pittsburgh introduced me on Instagram to Raphaela who was soon moving to the city. We chatted a few times before officially meeting at a local thrifters gathering. From there, Raphaela dragged Mike to my 30th birthday party and I effectively forced them to be my friends. The two of them became the first "dinner" guests I hosted in my new apartment - I made a frozen pizza with a side of potato chips. Without Instagram, our paths never would have crossed.<br />
<br />
As I slathered a cucumber in Eat 'n Park's Homemade Ranch dressing, Raphaela asked me if I was sure there was enough dressing on my plate. Mike started to interrogate the motives of the guy I'd gone on a few dates with. I was dissecting the guy I met online with the friends I met online.<br />
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It started as a joke. Within the space of an hour I downloaded and made profiles on Coffee Meets Bagel, Bumble, and Tinder. I screenshot the bare chested lads on horseback and sent them to my <a href="https://www.resellerwatercooler.com/" target="_blank">Reseller Water Cooler</a> girls for a laugh. Three hours later, I closed every single profile and deleted the apps feeling utterly defeated by the sheer volume and intensity I found.<br />
<br />
Internet dating felt too complicated. Based on a picture and a couple lines (if provided) summing up a person, I was supposed to judge them and determine whether or not I wanted to talk to them. From there, if matched, "talking" meant texting through an app. How do you get a sense of someone's personality from a text message? Can there be a spark through a text message? How do you share parts of yourself with someone you never met in person? Most importantly, how do you know this person isn't a serial killer?<br />
<br />
It wasn't going to happen for me, I told myself. This internet dating game was for youngsters and I was far too old to be dodging dudes looking for hookups. Was it really possible to meet my person through my phone? Obviously, dating online works out for people or it wouldn't be around. I just wasn't sure I could be that open.<br />
<br />
Texting Kristen for the 4 millionth time in a day, I placed my phone on my desk and leaned my head back into my chair feeling grateful for our friendship. I tell her everything, nothing is off limits...and I met her through Instagram. I saw her and Bryan at PoshFest 2018 after having followed them on Instagram and thinking they were funny, I approached them. And it worked out. They could have been awful rotten people with fake photos and captions, but I wouldn't know for sure if I didn't give it a chance. I shot up out of my chair and realized everything I was afraid of doing...I was kind of already sort of doing.<br />
<br />
I've already met my people and they all entered my life through an app on my phone. They supported me through the craziest 6 months of my life. I became friends with them not because of how great their pictures looked or how carefully crafted their captions were, but because I was willing to lean in and trust. If I wasn't open to starting friendships with these people through text, my reselling business wouldn't be as strong as it is because I would have missed out on some really great advice. I wouldn't be a apart of a podcast.<br />
<br />
So I tried again with an open mind. I chose Bumble and matched with a few guys and, after a few back and forths, agreed to a date with one of them. In our Reseller Water Cooler group chat, I sent my location in the event I wound up missing. They sent back X Rated advice in return.<br />
<br />
As I got out of the car, I checked my phone. Lindsay, an Internet pal I will meet for the first time in October, text me and wished me good luck. I told her I was nervous. I rounded the corner and opened the door to the restaurant and unleashed Single Jen unto the Internet Dating World.<br />
<br />
Buckle up, Internet Friends.<br />
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-53909226847619363762019-05-13T06:00:00.000-04:002019-05-13T06:00:03.245-04:00April Reads<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I joined a book club! And our first suggestion was beyond SAD, but truly profound. We chose to read <em>When Breath Becomes Air</em> which was a nice combination for my first book club read. The other two ladies in my book club are physicians and I'm an English major so it was the perfect combo.<br />
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For my new year's resolution, I'm supposed to read at least one book a week. In April...I fell of the wagon. But it was because I was embracing other areas of my life - getting into a new workout routine, moving into my new apartment, launching a podcast, and generally getting my life back on track. I don't regret one missed page I didn't read.<br />
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<strong><em><span style="font-size: large;">When Breath Becomes Air</span></em></strong><br />
Paul Kalanithi<br />
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<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">Crazy Rich Asians</span></i></b><br />
Kevin Kwan<br />
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<br />Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-294980775210970165.post-38563794420861258362019-05-09T06:00:00.000-04:002019-05-09T06:00:01.221-04:00Changes: Turning & Facing the Strange<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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At the same moment the keys to my new apartment were placed in my hand, he landed in Puerto Rico on a flight I was originally intended to be on with him. Instead, here I was thousands of miles away from those sandy beaches, nervously finding my way to my new door, placing the key in the lock, and ushering in the start of my new life.</div>
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The topic of change is polarizing. Can people truly change? How can they not? And what exactly does it take to change, if at all possible?<br />
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What we could most certainly agree is that life changes are inevitable and they are rarely the type we're prepared for. I wasn't prepared to uproot and restart my life over three months ago. I couldn't imagine finding a new place to live, new goals to set, and a new future that no longer included the partner I was certain would be there.</div>
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I've been through so much worse before, but this plot twist threw me under. I focused in on the death of my old life. I screamed and I cried and I begged the universe to put things back into place. But that's not how it works. What the universe did in response to my ravings was to grab me by the cheeks like a frustrated mother and turn my head to what had always been in my life: amazing friends, supportive family, and passions I stifled for far too long.</div>
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My life looks so different than it did at the start of 2019. I once thought I was too introverted to spend so much of my energy on social interaction, but here I am meeting up with friends I usually saw once every few months multiple times a week. I'm writing again. I'm dancing while I clean. I enjoy cooking meals, something that nearly drove me to tears months ago. I'm reading with intention instead of attempting to escape. I'm a <a href="https://www.resellerwatercooler.com/" target="_blank">PODCASTER</a>!! I'm conversing with strangers on the street in polite conversation.</div>
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When I woke up this morning, I stared at the ceiling and thought with excitement all of the things I wanted to accomplish today. Then, it hit me - I was excited to get out of bed. I can't believe I'm so fortunate enough to find myself here. Happy with the ordinary.</div>
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I didn't want this change to happen. I wanted my life to follow a certain trajectory. It's not, though. It's following something so much more beautiful, as long as I am willing to embrace it and all of the other unexpected changes certain to follow.</div>
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Jen Cristallihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17731096771784469100noreply@blogger.com1